


HHSCMS

by 3VAD127 (orphan_account), bookwormally



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, F/M, Gen, Humanstuck, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-29
Updated: 2013-04-29
Packaged: 2017-12-09 23:00:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/778958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/3VAD127, https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookwormally/pseuds/bookwormally
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stands for "Human High School Camp Marching Stuck"</p>
<p>In which we throw all 36 trolls into a high school AU, add in relationship drama, canon events, comedy, romance, and a sprinkling of the spice we call life, and stir.</p>
<p>Slice of Life AU that so far focuses on the youngest set's freshmen year and all the trouble they get in to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Friends

**Author's Note:**

> This AU was born from our collective hive mind and sprung to life in various drabbles across our tumblrs. Thought it would be nice to collect them cohesively in one place so here you are!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written by bookwormally.

Crying alone in the bathroom was not as lovely as the movies made it look. No one ever really cared enough to come looking. Especially when you had alienated and infuriated your only real friend. It was pathetic and lame, but if Eridan excelled at anything it was French, history, and being one of the most pathetic existences on Earth.

Crying pathetically alone in the bathroom sure beat going out in the halls and facing the taunting and ridicule for another twenty minutes until class started. His despair was interrupted by the creak of the door opening and Eridan swallowed his sobs as best he was able until they left. The last thing he needed was someone to get a teacher or counselor.

Unfortunately continuing in the vein of the universe is out to get Eridan Ampora, the pair of torn up sneakers stopped right outside his stall and whoever it was knocked. “Eridan?” The voice was male, held very little hint of an accent, and sounded frustrated.

He cleared his throat before risking a reply. “Yes?” He winced at the clogged sound of his voice. One foot began to tap impatiently and Eridan could easily imagine the crossed arms. “Open up. I need to talk to you.” Freezing Eridan’s mind raced. _I can’t let anybody see me. I can’t even tell who this is!_ Hugging his knees in an attempt to vanish he took a deep breath and forced the last of his tears from his voice.

“I’m sure it’s very important, but I have something else to attend to. I’m… studying for a test in history.” A sigh came, the footsteps retreated, and the door closed behind his visitor. Unfolding Eridan stepped out to wash his face. He couldn’t afford to let his tormenters know he had been crying.

A paper towel was shoved into his hand and he looked up in surprise to find Karkat Vantas scowling down at him. “You are a dumbass. Just because you heard the door doesn’t mean I left. Also you never have to study for history. Wipe your face and let’s go.” Eridan barely had time to shove his glasses back on his nose before the little Indian tornado was dragging him down the hall.

“Kar would you mind telling me exactly where we’re going?” With an eye roll the library door was yanked open and the very confused boy shoved inside. The libarian waved and Eridan returned it bemused as a voice called out, “Karkat there you are. I was worried I had wandered into the wrong library by mistake when you weren’t here waiting impatiently despite my arrival being the same time every day.” Kanaya Maryam was waiting on one of the couches situated in the middle of the library and Karkat shoved Eridan that direction before taking a seat.

“I had to go pick up an expert.” Kanaya nodded to Eridan with a smile. “Good choice. Eridan are we correct in assuming you have read the Twilight series?” Eridan blanched. He choked for a moment before finding his tongue and rounding on Karkat.

“You brought me here to talk about an admittedly great series? I thought this was important!” Karkat looked irritated (as usual) and almost smug. “We need a third debater who actually has something resembling a brain between his ears. And it’s time you stopped moping and realized you have more friends than just Feferi. Even though what you did was massively idiotic on an astronomical scale, we’re still going to be friends with you dumbass.”

Flushing a little Karkat looked away from him and threw a copy of Breaking Dawn at his face. “So stop complaining and help me prove to Kanaya once and for all the Edward and Jacob’s relationship is more complex and interesting than that of basic love interest rivals.” Huffing Karkat flipped his copy open to one of the many colored bookmarks.

Flushed a little himself Eridan breathed a laugh. “Heh you got it Kar.” Settling into the debate, Eridan smiled to himself the entire time. It was nice to be reminded that others cared even if they were a grumpy Indian boy with a deluded belief the Jacob was better than Edward.


	2. An Understanding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jumped back in time a bit here. Karkat is ten.
> 
> Written by bookwormally.

The kid was tiny that was the first thing Spades noticed. The second was that he looked beyond angry and that his hand was in the vice grip of the agent bringing him to the house. The agent herself was very well put together, the definition of successful business woman and she looked just as much like a shark. She probably hated children, wanted to work in some other branch before getting shuffled over to CPS. Whatever. It wasn’t Spades’ business what her background was.

The woman gave the professional empty smile all government workers had perfected. “Good afternoon Mr. Noir. I’m sure you aware that I’m here to bring Karkat here into your care.” Grimacing at the name he shrugged. “Yeah sure. Come in so you can leave.” Ignoring the highly affronted look he slunk back into his living room. The agent drug the kid in behind her even as she forced her smile back on.

She gave a cursory glance around the living room which was thankfully clean thanks to the missus and shoved the kid towards the couch. Then she rounded on Spades. “Now Mr. Noir as you know raising a child is very difficult, but this child comes from a broken home and requires special handling.” The child in question looked murderous at being talked about like he wasn’t there.

“Yeah okay. Obviously I can handle it or you guys wouldn’t be giving me the kid. My lady is out right now, but she’ll make sure he gets fed and all that. Now do you need anything else or can you get the hell out of my house?” The woman looked disgusted but forged on. “I just need to make sure you have a room set up for him and then a few papers and I’ll be out of your hair.” Spades thumbed up the stairs. “First door on the left.” She stalked upstairs muttering under her breath.

So it was just him and the kid. “So you got a name?” Dark eyes darted to meet his own before glancing away again. “Karkat Vantas.” Spades lifted an eyebrow. _So he’s part of that whole mess. Fucking government bet the family is fine._ “Alright cool. I’m still going to call ya kid.” Glaring was apparently the default expression for him. Luckily the awkward moment was saved by the reappearance of the CPS agent.

“Everything looks to be in order. Karkat remember you can call me if there’s any trouble and I’ll be checking in every six months to make sure everything is running smoothly. Good day Karkat, Mr. Noir.” She forced a handful of documents into Spades’ hand and then swept out the door. Pushing a hand through his hair, Slick sighed. “God what a bitch.” Karkat snorted before screwing his face back into anger.

“Come on I’ll show you your room and then the important places like the kitchen and toilet.” Walking down the hall he pointed to various doors. “Don’t ever go in my office. It’s none of your fucking business what I do in there. Stay out of my bedroom unless you’re with the missus, you’ll meet her later. Bathroom is right next to your room and here that is.” The room was friendly enough. Painted a light blue by his wife to remove the industrial white and the bed covers and curtains matched.

The kid took it all in expressionless. He ran a hand over the bed and the desk. Without turning to face him he asked, “Can I just stay up here?” Shrugging Spades stepped into the hall. “Sure I’ll send the missus up when she gets home and then I’m sure we’ll have dinner.” Slumping into his office Spades breathed a sigh. It was hard to talk to this kid and he might as well go over the paperwork and make sure he wasn’t responsible for legal fees.

Settling into the desk chair that was twice as comfortable as the one in his office at the school he flipped open the packet. _Blah blah blah don’t let him skip school, don’t let him do anything illegal, show him love but don’t smother him. What bilge._ The heading of the next page however was a bold ‘Background’ and Spades paused. He knew the rumors, the basic facts as anyone in town did. But this would be the nitty gritty. _It’s not like I’m spying on anything. God they handed it to me._

Still it was with a deep breath he began to read. _Karkat Vantas is the youngest in the Vantas family and until his point was under the guardianship of his oldest brother Sainath Vantas along with the middle brother Kankri Vantas. They were all under the care of the Maryam family, but official guardianship was awarded to Sainath. Taking recent circumstances into account the court has found Sainath to be unsuitable as a guardian for Karkat from this point on. Kankri and Sainath are both still with the Maryam family, but Karkat is in need of a steady home life._

_The Maryam’s appealed for guardianship as they had been raising the Vantas children, but they were denied. While they showed they were more than willing and able to continue to care for them, the lack of consistent presence of a true authority figure in the case of mother or father at the Maryam’s home resulted in denial of the request._

_Karkat Vantas will be placed in the care of Jack Noir and his wife until such time as they are deemed unsuitable as guardians._ Letting the paper slip to the desk he walked over and threw the window open. Lighting a cigarette he made sure to blow the smoke outside along with the ashes. Less work for his lady was best.

“I fucking knew it. Lack of an authority figure my ass. The Maryam girls are practically moms for everyone. Fucking government should focus on families with real problems.” Stabbing the cigarette out he made his way back downstairs glancing quickly at the kid’s door which was still shut tight and silence came from beyond.

And the silence continued until Spades’ wife returned home, arms full of groceries. She was a sweet lady and so excited for the kid to join them. “Ah Jack darling could you take some of these?” Easily scooping up more than half he helped her deposit the bags on the kitchen counter before giving her a peck. “He’s upstairs and has been pretty quiet since he got dropped off. Especially considering there was no reason for him to get taken from his family.”

She ran a hand over his face and down his chin. “Well then we’ll have to make him feel most welcome and be sure to let him visit home as much as possible. Now come and introduce me.” Easily leading her upstairs she took the lead and knocked on the door and called, “Karkat? May we come in?” The handle turned easily and he peered out warily. The missus offered the friendliest of smiles.

“Hello there. I’m Jack’s wife, Ms. Paint. It’s very nice to meet you.” She offered a hand and the kid shook it. “My name is Karkat Vantas ma’am. It’s nice to meet you too.” Well the kid had good manners at least. Lord knows he wouldn’t pick them up from Spades. “Welcome to our home Karkat. I’m getting ready to start dinner. Would you like to assist me? I have a few new spices I’m not sure of.” The kid shrunk into the doorway for a moment before nodding. “Sure. I know a few dishes.” They set off down stairs, his wife keeping her chatter light and friendly as Karkat nodded along. _Please let me be able to feel my tongue after dinner_.

Dinner turned out to be less mouth searing and more pleasantly tingling. The kid looked like the dish was a little bland for him, but ate without complaint. Ms. Paint continued her talk of her day and with Spades. Leaving Karkat free to jump in at any point. She was a natural and it was a thing of beauty. But then everything she did was beautiful. When Karkat did finally speak up it was to ask the question that all parties wished to avoid.

“When can I go home?” Ms. Paint’s hand stopped and she slowly returned it to the table. Spades carefully met her look and sighed. Apparently this was his to answer. “Look kid I know you don’t want to be here, but thems the breaks.” From the way she sighed that was not the best approach. And from the way the kid slammed his fork down it was the exact wrong one.

“But that’s not fair! My brothers are irritating assholes but this is bullshit! Kanaya’s family and mine have been getting along fine. Just because Sainath got injured doesn’t make it any different. Why don’t they go tear apart the fuckers responsible instead of taking it out on us?” Spades couldn’t help but grin and the missus kicked him under the table.

“That’s just it kid. The government doesn’t know shit about all that happens in this town so they just make judgments and hope for the best. Your family gets the short end of the stick this time.” Karkat was furious now and slammed his chair back. “Well fuck this bullshit!” He stormed out of the room. “Jack…” Paint sighed. “I’m on it,” he answered and followed Karkat.

The kid had grabbed his bag from his room and was halfway back down the stairs when Spades entered the living room. He froze on the steps and Spades stepped up to the bottom. “You can’t make me stay here.” Spades sighed. He really didn’t do parenting but he couldn’t really fuck this up. Government fines and court cases were a bitch.

“Actually I can. I’m now your legal guardian along with my lady. You fuck off and we get roasted for neglect, abandonment, whatever they decide to slap us with.” He let that threat hang and the kid looked away. “But quite frankly this taking kids from good homes just because they lack a constant parent thing is bullshit. So…” He let it hang as Karkat met his eyes hopefully. The damn kid was ten and this was utter horseshit. “You can go home as long as you come back whenever CPS starts sniffing around.”

The kid tackled him with a hug. “Thank you.” Spades ruffled his hair. “Yeah, yeah. Get off me before I kill you.” Ms. Paint appeared in the doorway and gave them both a smile. “Feel free to drop by anytime you need to Karkat. You can find your way home?” Nodding frantically in his excitement he gave her a squeeze too. “Thank you!” He raced out the door and Spades chuckled. He gave Paint a kiss and a squeeze.

“Don’t worry he’ll be back. Kid and I have an understanding.” Looking concerned she followed him back to dinner. “Jack dear what kind of understanding? Are you going to get him into trouble?” Her worries followed him, but Spades just smiled and promised himself to introduce the kid to the boys the next time both were over.


	3. Accidents Happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written by bookwormally.

It was the exact opposite of slow motion. One second was how long he turned away to reply to his brother and then the thud came not unlike when you hit an animal. Mituna and Sae-Yon were frozen as he scrambled from the car.

He could only stare in horror at the sight of his best friend crumpled on the ground with her hair haloed around her head and blood leaking from a scratch across her forehead. Sollux Captor had just hit his best friend with his car. Her mellophone had skittered across the pavement and he could see other band members running towards them. She had been walking to practice across the parking lot.

Sollux threw himself down next to her, his hands hovering not wanting to do more damage when he had already _hit her with his car_. “A-aradia?” he whispered. No response. He was vaguely aware of voices shouting overhead and the warm weight of his brothers’ hands on each shoulder.

“Mr. Noir! Aradia got hit!”

“God dammit. Cell phone now. I know one of you has one on you.”

“911 what’s your emergency?”

“Yes. This is Jack Noir. We just had a student get struck by a car here at the high school. She’s unconscious with what appears to be a head wound and-”

“They weren’t going any faster than 30 miles per hour.”

“But doesn’t that mean a fifty percent chance she could die?”

Sollux’s hands were shaking and he just wanted to crush Aradia in his arms. Apologies dropped from his lips in a whispered rush and the hands on his shoulder gave simultaneous squeezes. Then warm hands wrapped around both of his and he was crushed into a hug. Whoever it was her hair smelled of chlorine and her shoulder of sunscreen and she held him so tightly it felt like maybe she would keep his scattered pieces together.

The ambulance screamed into the parking lot and gentle but firm hands pulled him away so the paramedics could load up Aradia. Watching the flashing lights pull out of the parking lot was like watching a part of his soul leave and knowing he had wielded the knife.

“We’ll get him home.” The scent of chorine and sun screen was leaving and he tightened his hands. Didn’t they see that she was the only thing keeping him from spinning into a thousand pieces? “Or maybe… if you wouldn’t mind coming with us?” Sae-Yon’s voice usually so disinterested was softer than he had heard it in years. “Come on Sollux. We’ll take you home.”

The shock was starting to wear off as Sae-Yon directed them home and Sollux began to shake in earnest Mituna was watching him carefully and that was the worst. He had been watching out for his brother for what seemed like forever and now… _I hit Aradia with my car. I hit Aradia with my car. I probably just killed my best friend!_

In a cracked and broken whisper he spoke, “I’m going to be sick.” The car jolted to a stop and warm hands cradled his forehead as he lost what lunch he had eaten. Blinking away tears he was finally able to focus on his comforter’s face.

“Feferi?” Her sunny smile broke through the drawn expression she had been sporting. “Sollux there you are. I was worried for a bit there!” Unable to continue meeting her eyes he turned away, sitting down on the curb. He didn’t deserve any kindness right now or worry. _I hit Aradia with my car!_

Choking on building emotion he buried his head in his hands as Feferi took a seat beside him. “You know,” she drew the last syllable out. “Aradia is one of the strongest people I’ve ever met. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

A hysterical chuckle forced its way out and Sollux rubbed his forehead. “Yeah maybe and maybe she won’t even care that I hit her WITH MY CAR!” He was screaming at her now from a foot away. “I hit her Feferi! She trusted me and I hit her with a goddamn car!” Sobs broke the dam then and he could feel his brothers’ eyes, but Feferi simply pressed him tight against her shoulder again.

“Yeah Sollux you did. But it was an accident and Aradia won’t blame you. Heck I bet she comes back to school happy as clams to see you!” Snorting a little at the thought he slumped against her. Here he was with the nicest, prettiest, richest girl in school sobbing on her shoulder after hitting his best friend with a car and she was still comforting him; taking his tears and his snot and his vomit and offering a smile and hope. Her warm hands had held him together and still were soft on his hair. _Maybe… maybe I can get through this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Confused on who's who?
> 
> http://3vad127.tumblr.com/post/47607246884/character-profiles


	4. A Perfect World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Eridan is A Big Dumb and continues to think the world revolves around him. He also manages to get his heart broken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written by 3VAD127.

Your name is Eridan Ampora, and you are convinced you are in love.

The girl before you is the most beautiful being you’ve ever laid eyes on, and you’ve known of this fact since you first met her back in fifth grade. (There was a lone pine tree in the schoolyard, and you were sitting under it, alone, when her grinning face peeked into your hideout and her little hands grabbed yours and dragged you out. You never had a lonely recess after that.)

You’re both thirteen now, freshmen in high school, and your feelings for her have grown and flourished over the years until the well in your heart has turned into a spring and you can no longer contain the giddy excitement whenever you see her.

Her hair is inky black, thick and curly, often tangled at the nape of her neck or at the small of her back; you try to tame it, often, but she gets restless after a few minutes under the brush, so you often just let her go. She runs, but always ends up coming back to you, smiling. Her teeth are jagged and gappy but perfect, startlingly bright against the roasted macadamia of her skin. (You think, sometimes, she would make a lovely mermaid, wild and flitting against the backdrop of churning salt water and luring unsuspecting men to their deaths with the sound of her siren voice.)

You take her dark hands in your own and smile, small but giddy and excited. “So we’re going to Spring Fling together?” You have the perfect outfit; you have been planning since you started school in the fall.

You are so excited. So happy.

She’s so beautiful. So perfect for you.

You are the next power couple. Fuck Vantas’ older brother, What’s-His-Name, and his girlfriend. You and Feferi Peixes were made for each other, you are convinced of it. Best friends since elementary school, boyfriend and girlfriend in high school, lovers in college, husband and wife as adults.

Life couldn’t get any better.

*

The month is April, six days after the end of March (and also the end of your wardrobe malfunction fiasco), and you find yourself crying alone in the boys’ bathroom.

Your life fucking sucks.

**Author's Note:**

> bookwormally.tumblr.com/tagged/humanhighschoolcampmarchingstuck
> 
> 3vad127.tumblr.com/humanhighschoolcampmarchingstuck


End file.
